Before The Curtain: Predictions for The Life of a Showgirl

The Life of a Showgirl album cover.

We are mere days away from Taylor Allison Swift’s latest creation, The Life of a Showgirl. I have my cardigan in the mail, my AMC tickets secured, and I, along with millions of other Swifties, am waiting with baited breath to see what life-changing revelations this new narrative shall bring. But before we get the answers we so desperately need, I wanted to share with the world my predictions for each track and the topics I think they’ll cover. 

1. The Fate of Ophelia

Sir John Everett Millais painting Ophelia.

In a tradition now synonymous with Swift, you may have to do some googling before you enter the album. See, Ophelia is a character in William Shakespeare’s iconic tragedy, Hamlet. What’s interesting about this muse choice is Ophelia is not the main character. She’s barely even a side character in the narrative. Ophelia is a noblewoman, romantically involved with Hamlet, whose life is ruled by her father. In other words, her narrative is fully dictated by the men in her life. 

This is the connection, I believe, Taylor Swift will touch on in her song. The true fate of Ophelia is awful; she goes insane throughout the play, climbs up a willow tree, falls, and ultimately drowns. But this is where I believe the paths will diverge. Like in Swift’s record-breaking song Love Story, I think she is going to rewrite the fate of Ophelia so she breaks ties with the crooked men in her life. I have a feeling this could call back to her re-recordings, a time when her legacy was nearly destroyed by the men in the record industry before she fought back. 

2. Elizabeth Taylor

Elizabeth Taylor as Cleopatra in 1963.

Elizabeth Taylor is a legend. A noteworthy actress in the 1950s and 60s, and one Swift has referenced before in her song …Ready For It?. Taylor was an incredible philanthropist and activist, becoming one of the first celebrities to raise awareness for the AIDS epidemic. All of her good deeds were incredibly overshadowed by her salacious love affairs. Elizabeth Taylor was married eight times to seven men, one of them twice, and despite the amazing things she did, that became the headlines. Sounds familiar? Swift has always spoken highly of Elizabeth Taylor, and I believe she will speak about her own life through Taylor’s, drawing comparisons to how people slut-shamed a powerful woman who was just trying to live her life. 

3. Opalite

Opalite is an interesting title track, as Opal is the birthstone of October, a colorful rainbow that signifies hope, purity, goodness, and truth. What significant person was born in October? None other than Swift’s fiancé, Travis Kelce. However, Opal is not the title; the title is Opalite. Which is a cheaper imitation of the birthstone, something that looks quality but actually isn’t. It’s tough to tell which route she’s going with this one, but regardless, I do think this is going to be a Kelce song through and through. Whether it’s referring to him as opalite cause it just sounds better, or mentioning that now she’s found the real thing. 

Now the rest of these, as they aren’t referring to anything obvious, will be more of a guess. 

4. Father Figure

This might be a stretch, but I’m gonna go ahead and say I think she’s calling herself daddy here. I think this is going to be a flex song. An “I’m the father figure” type song à la The Man. She was thriving in her success when she wrote this album. She was touring the world, feeling unstoppable, and maybe wanted to write a song telling everyone that she got here without a sugar daddy. She IS the sugar daddy. 

5. Eldest Daughter

Ouch. As a resident's youngest daughter, I cannot relate, but I am scared for those of you who can. Given that this is a track five, it will most likely be a bit slower and more intentional than the other boppy poppy songs. I think this is going to touch on two things. First, that she literally is an eldest daughter and will expand on the pressures and responsibilities that entail. Especially as her parents are getting older. Second, I think this will also touch on being an eldest daughter in the music industry. Almost all of the pop girls now, Sabrina, Olivia, and Gracie, have cited Swift as an inspiration. That, in and of itself, must fill her with some responsibility to make this industry better for them. 

6. Ruin The Friendship

I don’t think this will be about Blake Lively. She hasn’t mentioned that relationship at all, and given the severity of the situation, I don’t think that is a topic Swift would willingly touch in its current state. Instead, I fear that ruining the friendship can only mean one thing. Crossing the line between friends into lovers. This was a really confusing title for me, since Swift and Kelce were not friends in any capacity when they got together. Then it clicked–a friendship bracelet. He wanted to give her a friendship bracelet, and that is what started it all. So that’s where I think this is going. 

7. Actually Romantic

I’m hoping for another love song! This time, calling back to all the things she over-romanticized in the past and recognizing that this fun simplicity is actually romantic. Not screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain. 

8. Wi$h Li$t

When Taylor Swift announced The Life of a Showgirl on Travis Kelce’s podcast, no less, she mentioned two things. Ever since she signed her record deal as a child, she has saved up and always wanted to buy back her masters. And the fact that Kelce did everything on her “wish list” to get her. Which is the literal phrase he used when describing how they got together. Given her master's were not technically bought back at the time of recording the album, I think this may be another love song. The dollar signs could be a nod to the fact that, in the end, it wasn’t money or fancy things that won her over; it was his heart. He was all she wanted on her wish list.

9. Wood

This will be NSFW. BUT I think she will use a lot of word play, “would” instead of “wood”. There are some theories about the microphone Swift used for the evermore set of the Eras Tour being called wood, and while that’s true, I just don’t see her writing an entire song about the album. The only other theory I could see Swift doing is having this song be a twist on the phrase “knock on wood”, hoping and praying for something to go her way. It seems very up Swift’s alley, but for some reason, I don’t believe that’s the energy. We’ll have to wait and see! 

10. CANCELLED!

Since Kelce says this will be a banger, I have a feeling it will be a This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things track. Sarcastically acknowledging the various times she’s been cancelled over nothing and how ultimately none of it matters. I do expect some slight millennial cringe with this one, which, as a slight millennial, I will admit I tend to enjoy. 

11. Honey

I have truly no idea what this song will cover, but I have a feeling it will be the next single, as Swift has said the word multiple times in promotional material. Nonetheless, I think it will be a bop. 

12. The Life of a Showgirl (Ft. Sabrina Carpenter)

My first prediction is that this song will feature all of the lines we’ve been seeing on the vinyl variants. “It’s rapturous, it’s frightening, it’s beautiful”. My second prediction is that Carpenter will get an entire verse to herself and join in on the choruses. I think this song will be an overview of the lifestyle; it’s exhausting, but overall worth it. I have no idea where she’ll go with this otherwise, but I have a sneaking suspicion the ending line will be a gut punch. Similar to Clara Bow. 

I’m excited to read this back and see what was correct and what was completely wrong. Either way, I cannot wait for this album! Be sure to check out Ribbon’s previous coverage on all things Taylor Swift.